Friday, August 19, 2011

The Return of Liquids

It's been so long since last I blogged.  There is too much to tell about everything T has been up to since July, so here's what happened before 11am today:
Temple and I went to the playground mall, as we are wont to do on Friday mornings.  We used to have a moms' coffee group that got together, but since all the babies started walking, the band seems to have broken up.  I'm so grateful to that group, though.  They helped me get out of the house in the early months. Anypoo, earlier this morning, I was changing Temple.  She was bare-assed on the table, squirming away, talking trash, and the new box of diapers was just out of reach, and unopened.  As much as I like to see T walking around with no pants on, I wanted to get her panted so we could hit the road, because I was jonesing for my daily 20 ounce McCafe, to which I am addicted.  Seriously, I get nauseous if I don't have one before 10:30am.  It's just like Trainspotting.  I kept my left hand on Temple's squirrel belly, and blindly rooted for a diaper on the shelf of the changing table, and I came up with a swimming diaper.  I figured the differences between the swimmy and a regular one was the swimmy went on like regular panties, was a little more expensive, and had fish on it.  If anything, I thought, it would be more leak proof, since it, allegedly, kept the business in the pants in the pool.  Airtight, I thought.  While I briefly thought I should save the expensive diaper for real swimming, I am extremely lazy, and decided to go the easy route.  
Back to the playground.  We were there for a few minutes, and Temple had gone up the stairs and down the slide about 29 times, and she was headed for the submarine.  She was struggling to get through the port-hole, and I went to shove her butt through when I noticed that she must have sat in a puddle.  Her bottom was soaked, and not just around the edges of her buttcheeks, which is where she usually gets wet if she busts a diaper, but nearly dripping wet.  Upon further examination, it was pee.  I thought, for a second, that I had forgotten to put a diaper on her.  That's what it was like.  I snatched her up, and tried to hold her in such a way as to not get pee on me.  I was unsuccessful.  In the nearby bathroom, I dried her off, wiped her clean, and re-diapered her.  I had no spare plastic bag, so I tossed the shorts she was wearing.  She wasn't going to fit in them for much longer anyway.  Then, we went to a nearby Gymboree to buy a new pair of pants.  
I generally don't put shoes on Temple until after we are done at the playground, because shoes aren't allowed there.  So, we are in Gymboree, and Temple is squirming to get out of my arms, so I put her down to walk around.  She is wearing a tee-shirt and a diaper.  No shoes, no pants.  She looks like a hobo.  I'm scanning the store for a cheap pair of shorts.  Someone who works there asks if she can help me.  I point at pantless T and say, "my daughter obviously needs some pants."  We bought some nice leggings that will last her through the winter.  Done.
Part II - we go back to the playground and mess around for a bit longer, and Temple starts saying "bye-bye" and going for her shoes (and the shoes of others), and as I'm trying to put her socks and shoes on her (which is much like shoeing a horse), another mom starts feeding her kids Cheeze-Its.  Temple reacts like a goat in a petting zoo - she heads for the food.  I try to get her away, but the mom is very nice and offers Temple a Cheeze-It, and asks me if it's ok, and I say sure, and thank you, and Temple starts wolfing down the Cheeze-Its like I don't feed her.  On the one hand, I don't want Temple to hog someone else's snack, but on the other, I'm glad to have found another food she'll eat, and I'm making a mental note to buy some Cheeze-Its when Temple gags and makes a noise like she's coughing up a hairball and barfs.  It wasn't like she spit up the Cheeze-Its, she vomited into my hands. 
I decided we were done with the playground for the day.  
Because my hands were full with a pee-baby, then yack, I took no photos of these events, so I leave you with a recent photo of Temple coming for your soul.